On February 1st I went into the Ruskin School for an audition. I was meeting with John Ruskin who was Sanford Meisner's apprentice. The audition went really well; I was present and in the moment, performed well and was told I was accepted into the school. In my excitement, I broke down knowing my Mom would have been so proud. I then apologized to John, who stopped my apology immediately. He told me to never apologize for feeling, that the emotion and vulnerability I had just shown was more beautiful than my audition, and that would be what makes me special. It was then that I knew I had a very exciting roller coaster of a journey ahead of me!
One of Meisner's famous quotes: "The truth of ourselves is the root of our acting."
 |
| Headshot by James DePietro |
I was doing the Scene Study with Master Teachers and each week we were paired up to perform our scene for the class and also a Director, Actor, or Producer that was teaching class that week. The first week I prepared a monologue as my scene partner was out of town. I was really happy with it, prepped with some friends from CAC and also got some direction from another friend, but our Coach that week didn't really love it. Barbara Tarbuck came in and she reminded us to remember what our secret was, as well as note the moment before the scene starts. That just gave me even more motivation to do more and improve for the following week. My scene partner, Nicole, and I had rehearsed for almost three weeks by the time our second class came around and Chris Mulkey was the Coach that week. He reminded us to find out what we want and need. He was so energetic he wanted to get up and act while he was there, and that kind of energy was just so contagious. Chris liked our scene and gave us some really great feedback for the next few weeks.
During our third week we had Paul Sand as our Coach. He opened by telling us to trust our intuition and that we are creative. He had such a huge personality and wanted to see that in our scene. I ended up letting the class and Paul know about my Mom because he asked me where this block in the scene was coming from when dealing with lines about my Mother. It was really emotional but also opened me up to a better understanding and allowing those feelings to be present and use them in a positive way. Paul came back again a couple weeks later and somehow found another way to bring emotion out for both Nicole and I and was very happy with our progress since he'd last seen our scene. Paul is such a funny guy so it's crazy he could bring the tears from me, but he sure knew what he was doing, in such a great way. For our next week, Billy DaMota came in to Coach. He was excellent, honest and had just written an article that went to the Hollywood Reporter about Casting Workshop scams. He gave us some great notes to take home and work on for the next class. In all honesty, I prefer to get notes and things to work on because there's always room to improve and every person will find different parts they love and parts that they dislike.
By the time we got into our fifth week, Nicole and I were really feeling good about our scene, 'Bone China' that was from a 10 Minute Play. Dave Florek was Coaching us that week and said to make sure we were finding the truth in the scene and that holding back can be more beautiful than letting all the emotion show. He ended up liking our scene and banter as sisters. Nicole got booked on a movie the night before our sixth week so I quickly found a monologue and started prepping it on the Friday night before my class on Saturday morning. I felt really connected to it and Paul Ruddy who was in that week really enjoyed it as well, said it was naturalistic and that in that scene could have been really difficult because of the content and was very impressed I'd learned it in a few hours. I learned a lot from all the information he gave throughout the class! Our last class was with Bruce Davison, who thanks to a very small class that day, was able to really get into feedback for everyone, tell stories, and teach us some things as well. I felt like Nicole and I had both listened to each other more and were really connected and Bruce noticed that as well and was very happy with our performances. It was so great to end on a high note! Plus, he ran us through this neat exercise where three people got up (I was one of them) and we all got to portray, anger, love, and pleading. He made us note what was easy, what was difficult, and where do we stop ourselves. I loved this! To make the class even better, he performed a monologue from 'King Lear,' and brought mad applause from all of us!
Overall, the eight weeks of classes that ended just over a week ago were so beneficial to me as an Actor but also a great way for me to work at something and feel really accomplished. All the emotions I went through were really rewarding and have given me even more to look forward to in my career. I was able to find my truth in the scene, in the moment, and I loved honing that skill again. As I told Nicole from the beginning and what Bruce left us with in our final week...you are enough. Always remember that!
