My Wonderful Grandpa

When I was back in Wisconsin last month we had found out my Grandpa had Cancer.  He never complained in all the years I knew him, but in the past few months he said his back was really bothering him and when they finally did an MRI they found Cancer.  I had come home on Wednesday and had gone to meet my Dad and him at the Hospital on Friday since they said his Kidneys were failing and he needed to be admitted immediately.  I had gone with my Dad to see him on Sunday and that afternoon he was put into Hospice.  Dad and I had gone to visit him again on Monday morning before we went Wine Tasting with my Aunts & Uncles (something we had planned for the past month) and as soon as we got done we went straight back to the Hospice.  Dad and I told stories about Grandpa, my Aunt & Uncle showed up, Bobby had called to say goodbye since he was on tour with his band and in the middle of nowhere and wouldn't have been able to make it home in time, and Grandpa's Priest had come and given the final blessing.  We had told Grandpa that it was ok to go home to to his wife and my Grandma, Isabel, his daughter, Nadene, and my Mom.  We held his hand and he peacefully left us.  It couldn't have been a more gentlemanly way for him to go, and my Dad noticed he had 'stick grip.'  My Grandpa loved airplanes and was always flying so this was completely normal for him as he flew up to Heaven to all of his loved ones that had already passed on.

My wonderful Grandpa, Edward!

Grandma & Grandpa - Milwaukee, WI (1940's)

I wrote this post after he died that evening and parts of it were also used for his Obituary.  'My Grandpa, Edward Wegner, achieved so much in his life and was an inspiration to many.  He passed at 7 pm tonight with family around and holding his hand.  We told stories at his bedside and I found out some wonderful memories he had shared with my Dad just recently.  He was a WWII Veteran, a Pilot that the Air Force tried to weed out because he was a Wisconsin farm boy that couldn't possibly be a good enough Pilot.  Yet, he had learned to fly from a neighbor who had an airplane and did his first solo trip at 16 years old.  A little bit of a rebel, owning a motorcycle his Father didn't know about, he hated cleaning the chicken coop, and bought an Auto Body Shop in Plymouth which became Wegner's Auto Body, that my Dad currently runs.  He got married to my Grandma, Isabel in 1947, had my Aunt Nadene and Dad, and loved taking the family on Summer trips all over the US.  One of his favorite trips with my Grandma was to Ireland.  Grandpa was inducted into the EAA Hall of Fame in 1999 and flew his airplane just this last year at 90 years old!  In fact, he was the first person that I flew in an airplaine with (and usually his open cockpit 1929 C3 Spartan) and if he wasn't working in his woodshop, he was taking walks and talking with everyone.'  I couldn't be more proud to be his Granddaughter.

So many friends and relatives showed up for the funeral to share stories about Grandpa; mostly people he knew from the airport and had only even interacted with just a handful of times.  He clearly made an impression on everyone!  They had Military Rites for him which brought me to tears, it was a wonderful memorial to him!  I never doubt that I hit the family jackpot in all aspects, my Grandparents, my Mom & Dad, and all my aunts, uncles, cousins, and more.  I'm so thankful to have the family that I do and we all have some pretty amazing Angels looking out for all of us <3

Thoughts of Mom

I read an article today on what region of the brain is the starting point for Alzheimer's and it excited me to find this information and know something that could potentially cause it could be stopped by just getting a good night's rest.  This is obviously not the case for everyone but if it could help, I'm willing to learn and read more on it!  As I read the article it made me think about my Mom and Grandma and I wanted to share my thoughts here :)

My Grandmother died 10 years ago after battling Alzheimer's and when that happened, I knew a little part of my Mom had died because she was so close with her Mom (my Grandma). It changed her, therefore changed me, and this disease is such a sad one to watch a family member go through. To watch my Grandma forget who we were, her ability to know how to eat, and even show emotion was devastating and the toll it took on my Mom, her sisters, brother, my Grandpa before he passed, and all of us who loved my Grandma so dearly was so difficult. Finding a way to slow the on-set of it, and a cure for the disease would be great but reading this article means it starts with a good night's sleep. A thing I have been far too aware of for the past couple months...if getting a good night's sleep means that I can keep my family and future from going through this, it is all the more reason to keep stress at bay, and take some time for myself. Before I came back to LA, I had spent a lot of time at home cleaning and organizing things so that it would be easier for my Dad to keep the house tidy without my Mom. I found a Thanksgiving card my Mom had written a couple years after my Grandma had passed, in it she said when she visited my Grandma that she would just constantly talk to her while my Grandma would just watch her. Then she'd lay her head on my Grandma's shoulder and cry, and Grandma would start crying too. She could no longer speak, she had lost the sparkle in her eye, and had even forgotten how to smile, but my Mom knew this was my Grandma trying to comfort her the only way she knew how. I cried as I read the beautiful note my Mom had written and I knew how much she loved her and missed her every day. Before my Grandma could no longer speak, she still called me her 'Tiny One.' I know my Mom got to reunite with her parents in Heaven just two short months ago and is able to have the conversations she'd been waiting to have for over 10 years. I can't wait to have a conversation with you again, Mom, I miss you every day.

Grandma & Grandpa Jacoby with my Mom over 30 years ago!

If you'd like to check out the article: http://www.medicaldaily.com/alzheimers-ground-zero-locus-coeruleus-373619

Losing my Mom is by far the hardest thing I've ever had to go through.  The reason I'm posting these stories and sharing memories is because I want people to feel comfortable with their feelings (I cry in public on a regular basis at this point) and know it's ok to hurt and grieve.  I think it's also important to keep someone's spirit alive and remember all the wonderful memories that were created.  I appreciate all the support my family, friends, and even just the passerby have been giving me and will continue to show me as I learn to live without the person who meant more to me than anyone else.  One day at a time <3 

Heaven Gained an Angel

I apologize for my sudden disappearance here on my blog...my life completely changed over a month ago.  Early Saturday morning on December 5th, my Mom was hit by a car in which the driver lost control on the icy road, and she killed about 50 feet from our driveway in Wisconsin as she was nearly home from her twice daily walk.  She was young, she was healthy, she had plenty of life to live, and she was my best friend.  I obviously wasn't in a place to write here or be creative partially because I was so busy helping my family, spending time with all of them, taking on the daily tasks that my Mom did, and trying to understand why this could happen to someone so wonderful.  I know that everything happens for a reason, our life is predestined for us, and that God must have needed her in Heaven more than we needed her here on Earth.  But that certainly doesn't make the days, hours, or minutes go by any easier.  I miss her more than I ever thought was imaginable.  I talked to her nearly every day on the phone and sometimes twice a day or more.  I'd call to tell her what my plans were for the day, if I was going out, when I was heading to work and had some time to talk, when I was waiting between auditions, to find out what she and Dad had planned for the night, how her job was going, excited about when we'd get to see each other next, about guys and going on dates, and pretty much everything else.  I could tell her almost anything, gave far too many details at times, but I know she always appreciated that honesty, and that was important.  I've been trying to take things one day at a time, while some are easier than others, that last month while I was back in Wisconsin was really just a blur of emotions and emptiness.  The last two weeks here in LA have been jam-packed, which has really been great.  My friends have kept me so busy and booked all my time between all of my jobs so that I have something to do.  The support from everyone has been unwavering and appreciated beyond any words that I could say.  Thank you everyone for your patience, support, love, and kind words; they have helped me through this time and will continue to do so as the days, months, and years go by.  Thank you to my readers for allowing me a safe space to share my life and moments with all of you. 

My Mom meant so much to so many people and I'm grateful to be her forever little girl.  I pray for strength every day...I love and miss you, Mommy <3

Home for Christmas!

I love to go home for the holidays to be around my family, celebrate with friends and good food, give gifts, and enjoy the snow and Christmas cheer!  Of course, after being home for over a week I'm ready to come back to LA and escape the two degree weather but while I'm there, I try to take it all in until the next time I come home.

Grandma & I during a Grandparent's Day Lunch
and even though I have a mouthful of muffin
this is still one of my favorite pictures of us :)

Unfortunately, I had to head home a little early because my Grandma passed a week before Christmas.  It was sudden and I was devastated that I couldn't get home to see her before she took my Aunt Nadene (her daughter's) hand into Heaven, as she kept telling my Dad while in the hospital, that the Angels were ready for her.  This was one of those moments where I realized, that's the closest I'll be to Heaven for hopefully, a long time.  She lived a very long and wonderful life and as I stood at her funeral with my family and Grandpa and accepted condolences I was reminded of what an incredible woman she was, how generous and friendly, always polite and inviting, helpful and talkative.  It made me even more proud to be her granddaughter, remembering all the great moments we shared these past 30 years.  There were always cookies waiting for me, games to play, envelopes to seal and mail, crafts to be done, things to be sown, drives to be taken, and recipes to be made.  I will miss her but know she's watching over me and proud of my dedication and hard-work.  To top it all off, one gentleman I met said that my Grandpa was his Hero.  It brought tears to my eyes to hear these people say such special things about my Grandparents.  I'm definitely lucky.

Business Select...thank you Southwest!

In switching over my flight so I could get home early, my Mom upgraded me to Business Select on Southwest for about $30.  As I got to LAX about 90 minutes before my flight was scheduled to leave I was greeted with two insanely long lines that wrapped around five times.  I didn't think I would make my flight but as I asked a Southwest Employee where I should go, she looked at my ticket, opened that velvet rope, and sent me to the front desk where I easily checked in.  Security was next but once again, my ticket did all the talking as the Security Clerk held his hand up to the long line and a group of three and told me to come through first.  Of course, the flight happened to be delayed for 40 minutes so having to wait wouldn't have been a big deal but Business Select made it so convenient especially with the holiday travel.  When it came time to board I was A1 which meant I was the first person on the airplane (aside from Priority Boarding) and to make my flight even more comfortable, got a complimentary cocktail.  I had an hour-long layover in Las Vegas where yet again, I was the first person on the plane and got another free drink.  That cocktail certainly helped since there was some major turbulence right before our descent into Wisconsin but overall, the whole Business Select experience was one of my best flight experience's ever and something I would highly recommend.  Thank you Southwest Airlines for making my flight a very enjoyable and easy to manage trip!

The first couple days in Wisconsin flew by with Christmas preparations like wrapping gifts, cleaning and getting Dinner's ready.  Having the whole family together was really nice and at night we were all able to sit down and relax to watch some of the SAG Screeners like Captain Phillips and Gravity.  We all really liked Captain Phillips; I really enjoyed the story, liked how the pirates made you feel for them, and how different a role this was for Tom Hanks.  Although, I wasn't a huge fan of his accent.  Gravity on the other hand, kind of bored me.  Usually, the Awards Show nominee's are a little lengthy and can be shortened some but I felt like Gravity kept going but wasn't getting anywhere.  I've seen Sandra Bullock do more in other movies but I would give it another chance and see it again.

Christmas Vacation continues in my next blog...